How to ask your boss for feedback
One of the most frequent things I hear when working with leaders is that they want more feedback. The higher in an organization they get, the less feedback they get – a relationship that stays steady all the way up to the point where they are deciphering the tea leaves of Board intentions. One practical tip to make the feedback you get more helpful: be ready to script a short feedback conversation at any moment – opportunistically. Have questions you’re ready to ask that are substantive and get to what you really need in terms of feedback. So, for example, say a leader happens to get five quick minutes with his boss between meetings and the boss asks, “how are things going?” The leader should be ready with something that sounds like this:
“Great, thanks, but I had a question about project X I’m working on. I’m working with Jones and Smith to ramp them up to make good decisions for the client and I think its going well. Any advice you’d have for me?”
What you’re trying to do is be ready with a “script” you’ve developed that asks for exactly what you need but that also leaves room for the boss to weigh in on issues he or she thinks are important. Avoid yes or no questions. Have two sentences that set the context and ask for specific feedback and then close with a request for advice or “counsel” – a wonderful word in the English language that manages to ask for something while simultaneously complimenting the person who you’re asking (counsel is, by its nature, valuable). The whole conversation should take 3-5 minutes and your boss should be doing 80% of the talking.
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Reader Comments
Great thoughts Rob. I think that many of us underestimate the fear of our leader to provide us feedback. After all, most leaders have not had great role models in providing feedback and therefore, fall into the trap of behaving just like their boss. Taken the initiative in a low key way provides the opportunity and environment to get what you want without the formality that will “scare off” the boss.
I like this approach. I have worked for a boss who is not direct in his communication style. It is hard to find out exactly what he/she wants. When I setup formal meeting to talk about stuff the conversation seems arkward.
I would like to find topics on how to work on the “right” stuff as it is easy to get mixed messages at work.
In this example, I believe I would hear advice on how to handle the situation rather than feedback on how my boss thought I was handling it. Why not the more direct, “Can you suggest ways for me to improve the ways I am helping Jones and Smith ramp up?”